Custer pie Bigham teacher

silhouette of child looking on window blinds
Photo by Johan Bos on

Okay, so I wasn’t into learning as a kid.¬† Most teachers didn’t seem to be able or willing to help in my learning either and so I just went to school.¬† I arrived, stayed there during the day, attempted to eat the disgusting food¬†at lunchtime, dodged bullies¬†and generally came home safe.¬† Learnt nothing much, was gormless and sadly apathetic.¬† I was encouraged by my father to conform in going.¬† My mother was so into nature I think that rubbed off, for I loved to look out of the window and so much more wanted to be outside.¬† Even now looking outside is a comfort to me when inside and stressed.

So how did I find myself as an adult, doing a spot of temp work in a school?¬† Probably due to the words per minute I had self taught on a typewriter,¬†but there wasn’t a lot about knowing what all the words actually meant.¬† Anyways, here’s the story:¬† Once upon a time, a teacher’s hand writing at that school¬†was so bloody diabolical and utter scribble, that his O, R and N sort of ran¬†together, as if¬†it was¬†am.¬† Well, as I had no American history knowledge whatsoever¬†(knowledge lacking, not intelligence) I just¬†typed what I¬†saw a bit like the UK¬†TV¬†programme Catchphrase’s “Say what you see”.¬† I was doing¬†great and¬†typed that things so bloody fast letter by letter, word for word, documents done.¬† Of course I didn’t type¬†Custard, I could see it was Custer (who ever he was).¬† What I did type however, was a lot about a place called “Big-ham” and to¬†be exact¬†Little Bigham.¬†¬†I checked it all a few times, collated the papers as¬†all seemed grand and correct.¬† So I ran¬†lots of copies for perhaps over thirty students.¬† I placed them neatly on the desks.¬† Jobs a good un, well that job might have¬†been, but for me it didn’t last long and as this story goes, it was¬†The End!

flag of america
Photo by Sharefaith on

To be honest I’m glad I hadn’t been taught traditionally told¬†American white history.¬† I’m still not interested in a place called Little Big Horn and¬†glad¬†I¬†hadn’t a bloody clue back then.¬† For the teacher was an angry man and perhaps he needed to have an adult point out his handwriting flaw through no fault of my own.¬† So to all those who try teaching kids of the kind¬†I still am,¬†good luck with that.¬† Just¬†stay kind though¬†(unlike the angry¬†man of that day) for although World Teachers Day was¬†due on Saturday, apparently today is the official day to celebrate it (at UNESCO Headquarters in Paris).¬† I know of one teacher’s daughter who is following on in her father’s footsteps and good luck to her, for she although she can be a bit pushy, she¬†is a good ‘n’ and totally up for being vegan, kind to animals and a bright spark to boot too and would probably encourage kids to think for themselves.

selective focus photo of brown dreamcatcher
Photo by Artem Beliaikin on

3 thoughts on “Custer pie Bigham teacher

    1. I’m wishing her my best wishes, for she sounds like a good ‘n’ with a sensible compassionate head on her shoulders. Well done to you for being her mother and helping her get to this point.


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