Someone once said to me a saying that did NOT help! Instead it made me so upset and angry at their total lack of empathy and compassion for me. For I was really suffering!
They obviously didn’t know how to help, but wanted to say something, anything that made them sound clever (and with a religious overtone). For they had been put into a senior “Shepherding” position over me. I perceived straight away that they just wanted me to stop talking (and out of shock I obliged). The saying they spouted was: ‘A sheep will fall in a pit, but a pig will wallow in it’. So wherever you are, that person who hit me with those hurtful words that you thought made you look wise and important, well, I still feel it necessary to say in my mind’s eye “F’ off why don’t you!”
You see, that saying about wallowing is always going to be a said to shut someone up. It’s to make the person saying it sound so full of wisdom and the other rejected, but it’s not clever, it’s cruel, selfish and potentially dangerous! Admit it, it truly says more about the person saying it, than the one it is projected at. It shows they acknowledge the pit is too deep for them. It isn’t obvious, but they’re scrabbling for safe footing and clutching at words. Sorry, but they’re sheepish and cannot help you get out. They use this grabbed at saying, so they can quickly clamber out of the way of filthy despair and stay looking smart. Thing is, they’re not as intelligent as a pig, an intelligent pig will use mud to keep parasites off their skin and stay cool, unlike dumb sheep (sorry sheep, but you are) who get ticked off! You know what’s a more honest and kinder thing to say: “You’re not alone, I just don’t know what to say.”
Over Soil 
Ouch! Well said.
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Just saying it how it is when folks want to look like they have a smart answer. Sadly none of us are smart, we all don’t no diddly squat in the big scheme of things. We just have to muddle along doing the best we think we can.
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I just read your top post again and only realised it when I reached the end, for it’s one of those “Sticky” posts innit! Does it have to stay sticky?
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No, it doesn’t. It’s a kind of introduction to the blog that I tweak from time to time. I’ll choose another, just for the heck of it.
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Done! 🙂
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